Adulterated Happiness (Part 1/2)

Hey, folks! Thanks for your interest in reading this story. I appreciate you visiting my page. Loosely based on true events, this story spans the rise of a football legend and his brush with different life experiences. This story is written in two parts and shows how the protagonist’s character evolves over the course of his career. I hope you enjoy reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please feel free to send in your feedback and, once again, thanks for your interest.

(Average Read Time – 12 mins)

Adulterated Happiness

May 1972 –

Fiorindo Baggio is dribbling the ball cutting all Brazil players one by one and leading the charge for Italy. The entire stadium has risen up on its feet to witness Italy’s first-ever win against Brazil. Fiorindo’s son, Roberto, is also in the stadium watching his dad bring it home. The crowd cheers in excitement as he skillfully dribbles the ball and gets closer to the goalpost. The goalkeeper charges onto him as expected. Fiorindo smiles to himself, raises his leg, and kicks the ball in full force towards the goal post… but unfortunately misses it. Italy has lost the World Cup. All Italy supporters are in shock. A dejected Fiorindo comes home late in the night. His five-year-old son Roberto is still awake waiting for his dad to come kiss him good night. But instead, he sees his father crawl into the bed and weep like a child. He cries the entire night, throwing away his football gear in anger while little Roberto silently watches the drama unfold from his blanket.

15 years later –

Roberto is sitting on a bench waiting for his turn to play. It has been three days since he stepped on the field. As the day got darker, he sat there, seething with anger, dramatically criticizing every move his team made. Exasperated by the exclusion, Roberto stood up and went to see his coach again. After several warnings over his aggression, he was pulled out from the field… but staying away from the game was something Roberto couldn’t tolerate. As he was about to apologize, his coach looked away and went back to cheering his players on the field.

“Coach, how long is long enough for you to accept my apology?” Roberto finally asked. The coach looked back at him and replied, “As long is long enough for you to control your aggression.” Roberto sighed, “Being aggressive is my style, coach… it brings out the best in me. Also, isn’t aggression the true nature of this sport?”

“Roberto, I can’t let you on the field with this attitude. Not only will you be penalized; the team will lose points. Secondly, and more importantly, you need to learn to control your adrenaline rush before you venture out in the opponent’s field.” Roberto gave a confused look.

“Football is not a game of aggression. In fact, it is the opposite. It is a game of controlling your mind, knowing when to be aggressive and when to use your opponent’s aggression to your advantage.”

It was a long day with no play. As his feet slowly took him back home, his mind kept going back to the coach’s words. Roberto just wanted to get back on the field somehow. Swamped in thoughts, he didn’t realize there was a car that had slowed down and halted in front of him. As he moved away from the car, a sleek female voice called him out.

“Hello, Mr. Baggio. Can I get an autograph please?” Roberto was startled. He looked inside the car. “Jacquie, thank God. I needed to see you today.”
“If you keep getting lost in your thoughts like this, you will soon forget that I’m your girlfriend.”
“Come on, that’s not going to happen. I had a bit of an argument with my coach today”
“I see. Do you want to get burgers at our regular place? Maybe it will help with your mood.”
“Yeah, let’s do it but I need to take a nap before that…”
“Okay, I’ll pick you up later in the evening,” she said kissing him goodbye.

It was dark by the time they got to the burger joint. They parked the car in a corner and decided to eat inside. The burger in his hand smelled delicious but Roberto was barely interested. His thoughts kept going back to the argument. Jacquie knew how keen he was to get back on the field. She sat quietly beside him allowing him to vent out all his frustration.

“Oh, God. I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize I’d been crying about this for the past twenty minutes” said Roberto realizing the burger in their hand had gotten cold.
“Don’t worry about it, Rob. You needed to get this out of your head.”
“You know, sometimes, these parked car conversations with you on silent evenings feel so relaxing,” Roberto said squeezing Jacquie’s hand. She smiled back.
“By the way, did you see the pictures I texted you?” he asked with eagerness keeping his burger aside.
“No, I didn’t. When did you send them?”
“An hour back. I got a new pair of shoes. Pass me your phone. Let me show you.”  
“It’s in the side pocket,” she said relishing the fries in her hand.

Roberto was excited. He picked up her phone and unlocked it… but then something weird happened. He saw a couple messages from an unsaved number. He couldn’t resist the urge and opened it.

“Last night was fire”
“Yes, it was. You are hot.”
“My back’s paining”
“Hehe… My thighs are paining too.”

His hands started trembling, he couldn’t believe what he was reading. At first, his mind refused to believe it thinking he must’ve picked up someone else’s phone… but then it dawned on him. It felt like the car roof suddenly fell onto his head. His knees weakened, heart rate increased and he felt a sense of dizziness. Unaware of what’s going on, Jacquie casually asked, “What happened?” He turned towards her and showed the screen. Her face lost water seeing what he had gotten his hands onto. She grabbed the phone from him in shock. An unpleasant numbness took over Roberto as he zoned out in disbelief. Everything began to fade out. There was a deafening silence for a few seconds and then all he could hear were songs of apologies and cries of mercies as he slowly opened the car door and left.

The next few days were the hardest. His heart was broken. He stayed in his bed curled up the entire day and took off from practice. Life had stopped for him. When he was home, he couldn’t resist the urge to go out, and when he dared to venture out, he couldn’t wait to get back home and curl up in his bed again. He was restless in every moment… it was a feeling he didn’t know even existed. It felt like an irreversible damage, beyond any hope of repair.

“Sorry, do you belong here?” the coach sarcastically asked when Roberto finally showed up for practice after a week. Roberto looked at him, but this time instead of answering him back in his usual sass, he apologized. His coach was surprised to see the unusual change in Roberto’s behavior. This was not him; he could tell. After practice, he pulled Roberto back and sat him down.

“Are you alright, Roberto? You look depressed” 
“I’m not… but I will be,” Roberto said looking down. “I feel life has always been unfair to me.” The coach wondered for a brief moment and then without asking for any specifics said “Look, son, there are things in this world that you may not understand now. You are just a young lad. There will be a lot of emotions that you will experience for the first time. Sometimes, you face certain things because there is a greater good associated with them in the future. So, don’t rush into making opinions. Let your opinions develop with time and experience.” There was a brief silence.
“And, look, I understand you are not in your best moments… but you need to be stronger than your situations. We all see big potential in you, Roberto. So, keep doing what you do regardless of your emotions. If you are heartbroken, come to the practice heartbroken. If you are tired, do it tired. No one has ever gotten exceptional at their skill by working only when they are in the right mood. So just keep doing your drill. Keep yourself occupied.”

It was the first time his coach had parked out his stern character and spoken to Roberto as a friend. Something that he really needed at the moment. With time Roberto got back to his routine. He spent all of his free time practicing in his backyard. He was scared of being alone, and spending idle time had become a challenge for those memories rushed back haunting him. As Roberto spent more time on and off the field focusing on football, he began to understand the nuances of the game. He started taking football more seriously making it the central theme of his life. Everything else had subsided. Having his heart broken was perhaps a blessing in disguise. It turned his analytical mind on and instead of assessing every situation emotionally, he began to think rationally.

A year passed by, Roberto had made progress both professionally and personally. He was now the center forward attacker for the club and the smile that was lost for months had returned. As he began to get promoted within clubs, he became the prodigy that everyone talked about. His club created a customized plan for Roberto giving him special attention. He desired to play for Italy one day and bring home the World Cup. The selection for the nationals was just a month away. It had become the primary focus of his life. Creating a perfect routine, he gave away everything that wasn’t football. It was his chance to become the youngest player to qualify for the nationals.

On the evening of his first practice game, while Roberto was stretching, he felt a sharp crack in his knee. He rubbed his finger over it and noticed a slight swelling. At that moment, he remembered his awkward tumble down the ground earlier in the game. He rushed to the hospital in a panic. There were a plethora of thoughts running through his mind. He couldn’t afford to miss a practice game let alone the entire tournament. Sitting across the physio, Roberto was getting jittery. His fingers trembled, sweat all over his forehead, and a rising swelling across his knee.

The doctor looked at him and gave him a glass of water. “I want you to calm down first and take a deep breath. Whatever it is, we will figure out a way” she calmly said. Roberto looked at her and nodded.
“Is this the same leg that had a twist last month?”
“Yes, it is… and that’s why I’m worried”

She tapped it lightly moving her fingers around the wound. The swelling had now increased.

“We’ll need an x-ray to see how bad it is. Once we have the reports, I can work with you on the recovery plan.”

Roberto’s heartbeat rose hearing words like reports, recovery plan and he felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. It felt like another heartbreak was coming his way. In a trembling voice, quivering nervously, he said, “I’m really scared, doc. I have been working hard for the last few months. What if it’s a hairline fracture, or worse what if it is more than that? What if I have to get plastered and sit out of the league”

She got up from her seat and came next to him noticing his nervousness. It was not her first time dealing with anxious patients. In a caring voice, she softly said, “I understand your concern, it’s legit. I, too, would’ve felt the same way… but do you know what I do in such situations?” Roberto looked at her and nodded. “When I have a lot of questions and the future seems hazy, I change all my what-ifs to even-ifs. So, instead of thinking what if it is a fracture… I would think even if it is a fracture. Instead of asking myself what if I have to sit out of this league?… I would think even if I have to sit out of this league? And it always gave me moral support and a new perspective.”

Roberto didn’t say anything. He shrugged his shoulders and responded with a crossed-finger gesture.

“Thank you, ma’am. I hope this is not as bad as I’m making it to be” he said standing up to leave.
“Of course, we’ll meet soon… and please call me Andrea” she smiled and left for her next appointment. 

Roberto’s fear came true the next day. It was more than a hairline fracture. He had to sit out the entire league. It was devastating. He didn’t feel like talking to anyone and sat down by himself outside the hospital. His brain had stalled. Every heartbreak felt heavier than the previous one. There are some moments in life where you lose the motivation to keep going… to a point where you won’t resist if death even happens to choose you that day. As the evening approached, Andrea saw him sitting on a bench outside her hospital. He hadn’t left. She came down the stairs and sat next to him. He looked at her with disappointed eyes and handed her the report. “I know…” she said in a soft tone. 

“People say I’m a prodigy, but I’m not sure if I’m even made for this game,” he said with a smirk. “I’m out of the contest now. I still don’t believe this is happening for real. All the hard work, practice, and sacrifice seem useless. Perhaps this is life’s way of navigating me away.” This time the tone had graduated to anger. He was not in denial anymore, and the acceptance had unknowingly led him to anger. “The thought that something as petty as a fumble on the field has led to such a critical injury is frustrating. What am I supposed to do now? Go in therapy and treatment for the next six months and then start all over again from scratch like nothing happened? It’s not easy. It takes a toll mentally, physically, and emotionally.” The disappointment in his eyes was real as he stood up and left.

The injury took Roberto away from the game for a few weeks. It was the hardest thing. He tried not to think of football… he didn’t watch any sport on TV, stayed away from his friends from the football club, and read books to distract his mind. His only interaction with the outer world was through his appointments with Andrea. During the sessions, they talked about everything besides sports. While she introduced him to yoga, aromatherapy, and transcendental music, he talked to her about his newfound obsession with Buddhism. Life was playing a strange game. The guy who was supposed to win Italy a soccer world cup was sitting on the sidelines keeping himself occupied with everything other than soccer. With time Roberto’s knee movements began to normalize and their equation graduated from patient care to friendship. Having is heartbroken was turning out to be a blessing in disguise again.

A month later while he was returning home from his appointment, he found a letter in the mailbox. The stamp on the letter seemed familiar. Confused, he double-checked if it was addressed to him and then curiously opened it. At first, he didn’t believe it. He triple-checked the stamp and the name… and then, in that moment, a shock wave ran through him and his breath got shallow again…

• Read part 2 of this story here