A brush with reality

Today, we visited my dad’s friend for lunch. Our families have known each other for a long time, and it was sort of a reunion.

It felt really nice to see them after such a while. Their son was an adult now. I remember seeing him as a kid crying on his mother’s lap, but now he was a grown-up guy.

While we were all chatting, he kept to himself listening to us quietly. Very soon I realized he had a stuttering problem in his speech.

Literally, after ages, I was seeing someone going through the exact same problem I once had.

Seeing him, I went into a spiral of thoughts that reminded me of every instance wherein I had to go thru this ordeal of speaking in public. I have been through numerous instances with my cousins and friends when my speech was the subject of laughter.

Yes, I didn’t like it. I felt bad every time there was a joke around it and how much it impacted by confidence to speak up. As I grew up a little, I started noticing the reality behind those jokes… and perhaps that was my first brush with the struggles of life. I laughed along with them just to feel included… but inside, within me, I used to bite my tongue and regret for opening my mouth.

However, with time, my speech clarified and I forgot everything about it until today, when I saw him, and my heart went out to him. We always relate more to people who remind us of ourselves.

Adulthood opened my eyes to the toxicity I had normalized in childhood.

Today, I’m not writing this from a place of hatred or revenge. I’m rather writing this from a place of contentment and empathy.

It actually feels liberating to talk about this openly, and I understand that most people going through this can’t express out their feelings freely.

Looking back at that kid who was struggling with the basics of life, I realized how comforting it would’ve been to have someone who stood up for me in that phase.

In my view, standing up for someone in their times of struggle is the purest form of affection. And affection isn’t always made up of grand gestures, it is also made up of such little things. Little things that show care and kindness.

If life ever gives you the opportunity to stand up for someone, catch it both hands… for you never know how much it could mean for that kid sitting quietly in a corner biting his tongue.